September 6, 2006

Take Those Old Records Off The Shelf

Okay, so Tom Cruise apologized to Brooke Shields and she went on 'The Tonight Show' and talked to Jay Leno about it on Friday. Presumably Shields was promoting her guest arc on 'Nip/Tuck' this season and we're sure there was begging (or large amounts of cash) involved on Tom's part to make it all come off so flawlessly. On Tuesday, Rosie O'Donnell returned to ABC as the moderator of 'The View,' where she mentioned that she was on her meds these days so we should not expect anymore crazy lesbian haircuts. When asked about her infamous love for her Tommy and his dislike for anti-depressants she said something to the effect of, "I'm not saying who this huge bouquet of flowers is from, but it could be from Tom Cruise." Perhaps the 40 percent plunge in his likeability rating during the past year has convinced Cruise to cut out the crazy. A rep for Marketing Evaluation, Inc., a company that measures Q ratings (how the public perceives celebrities) said, "Compared to 2005, he's [Cruise] shown a dramatic decrease in appeal. And his negative reaction which is the other side of the spectrum is virtually double, up 100 percent." There was the Paramount divorce, then the announcement that the Six Flags Guy was going to finance Cruise's company, then all of a sudden we have a week of brilliant spin. Hopefully Cruise has gotten the hint that the Good Ship Scientology is sinking and his career is treading water along side it. But all hope is not lost. Tom can host a Saturday Night Live this fall and do a 'Risky Business' skit in his underwear. All will be forgiven. Well most of all anyway.