December 1, 2006

Lohan Letdown, Part I

While it's a given that Lindsay Lohan is an out of control brat who is running her career into the ground, we must give credit where credit is due. Her publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnick, is apparently too busy dropping the Zelnick from her name to actually perform her job with any measure of competence. You may remember dear old Leslie from the Britney/Matt Lauer debacle and since Brit Brit fired her lazy ass, one would assume she could manage the affairs of her one major client, Lohan, with some sort of professionalism. Being that Lohan is only 20 years old with a booze hound cokehead for a mother and a father in prison, an older, wiser publicist might come in handy when navigating Hollywood's treacherous waters. After all, Lindsay's drug and booze addled mind can not handle the responsibility of speaking to the press. This is why stars pay publicists. A publicist is paid to make their clients look good. They don't allow their clients to be the laughing stock of the entertainment world. See how that works, Leslie? So to wrap up this week in Lohan news....there was the Paris fight and Lindsay's on air interview about it. The following night at a club in LA, there was another fight between Lindsay and Paris, this one involved people pulling Lohan and Paris off each other, Brit Brit was there and was on Paris' team, and the quote of the night was from Paris and was something along the lines of, "You cokehead, don't ever say you're my friend again." This of course was all rumor, because Paris Hilton has Eliot Mintz as a publicist and he is always present, assuring that no stupid remarks make it to the legitimate press. Moving on....Lohan spoke of the Paris feud to USA Today. According to Lohan, Monday morning was just a photo opportunity and she is not really friends with Paris. Okay. Thursday night Lohan attended the GQ awards where she made an ass of herself resulting in today's horrid Page Six story: DESPITE attending "several" Alcoholics Anonymous meetings this week, Lindsay Lohan drank champagne and made a big scene at the GQ Men of the Year dinner - all under the watchful eye of her hard-partying mom-ager, Dina Lohan. When the Lohans arrived at the exclusive dinner at the Sunset Tower - joining the likes of Leonardo DiCaprio, Al Gore, Jay-Z, Jennifer Connelly and Magic Johnson - she "flipped out" upon seeing Jessica Biel, the luminous star of "The Illusionist," there with her assistant. Biel's assistant used to work for Lohan and earned the "Mean Girls" star's ire when she quit several months ago. According to a witness, Lohan started screaming, "If she stays, I'm outta here! I can't look at that girl! I can't believe you would allow an assistant in here - she doesn't belong in here!" Lohan was shunned at the glittering affair by other celebs who are tired of her bratty antics and bad work ethic. Overhearing her tirade about Biel's assistant, Will Ferrell turned to DiCaprio, Gore and Affleck and said, "Who cares about that freak anymore, anyway?" - setting off laughter. Later, Lohan, with a champagne glass in her hand, tried flirting with Leo, to no avail. When "Jackass" star Johnny Knoxville arrived later in the evening, Lohan lit up and the two began nuzzling and necking - until Lohan's ex, Harry Morton, appeared. "Harry had been called by Lindsay, and he arrived with a bunch of her friends, and then they all left together, including Johnny. It was weird," said a source. "Dina did a lousy job of reining in her daughter, and it looked like she just used Lindsay to get into the party in the first place."