December 18, 2006

A Few Suggestions, If We May

Paris Hilton and her wonky eye went out to lunch in New York last week with Brandon Davis and the NY Post claimed she followed it up with some cocaine. Clearly there is something white in her nose and her tortured publicist, Eliot Mintz, responded with, "I can tell you Paris does not use narcotics. I would imagine [it's] something like whipped cream or a sugary substance from dessert. Something that naturally might have found it's way to onto her face if she touched her nose or whatever. I'd label it a stray dessert." Wow, that is creative. This guy definitely deserves a raise. Not that anyone believes him, but he does get an A for effort. Paris should take a cue from arch-enemy Lindsay Lohan and cut her coke with Strawberry Quik so the pink powder blends in with the inside of her nose. OR....and we're reaching here, Paris could think about giving drugs up altogether. Perhaps use her time and money for the benefit of others. It's called charity and it's all the rage amongst New York's social set. Ideally she would just go far, far away from here, but that seems to be a near impossibility. We can dream.